It cost me $4 at a consignment shop. The zipper had been broken for about six months, and the wrist strap fell off a year ago. This cheap wallet was subconsciously bringing me down to a poverty mindset, and I am vowing right now, never again, to let that happen.
I've been a business owner for about five years. Each year I have had significant growth. I'm a productivity and health speaker, coach, and author. I budget like a bad-ass, and when my mortgage is paid off in four years (or less!), I'll be debt-free at the age of 47. What I do is cyclical, and it's hard to know how much money will be flowing in and out months down the road.
My first six months of 2017 was the pits. Bad. Awful. Thank kittens for my budgeting prowess that I had three months of biz and personal expenses (not including emergency savings) to get me through it. I had hired a business coach when I was running on fumes #InvestmentNotExpense #CantAffordNotTo and she helped me realize I needed to treat myself to the level of value I provide my clients. She even went so far as to say I should be charging more than her based on my results.
Had I been sabotaging myself?
Not exactly. I had planted a tractor-trailer worth of seeds through marketing in the first two quarters, and slowly they started growing until harvest time, and I ended the year with a 16% growth, my largest contract ever and feeling confident again with what I could provide.
I'm frugal but not cheap. I look for a deal but not at the expense of buying what I don't need. I don't buy shiny objects on sale for 70% off just because they cost less, but I did typically only buy myself used clothes, would wear things much too long and had been carrying that damn broken wallet for almost a year.
Boom. Epiphany. #LightbulbMoment
Every time I looked at that broken wallet, took my card out of it, grabbed some cash or even fished around in my purse, there was a sad, can't-even-zip-up wallet telling me my worth. How could I be or feel successful when that's what I think I'm worth? How can I expect money to flow into something that doesn't even close all the way?
On Christmas Day I had a revelation on the way home from dinner. My friend had received a gorgeous Henri Bendel wallet, and it was exactly what I needed regarding size, fitting my phone and lipstick and was high-quality.
But, OMG, it was $218.00! I'd never paid that much for a wallet before and put it in my shopping cart while it was on sale for $109 and let it sit for several hours. I never buy things on a whim, not even the $10 water shoes from Amazon that are in my cart right now.
After a few hours, I decided that this wallet was mine. It was going to last me a long time, was beautiful, had everything I needed and was looking for and ………Submit.
The next week when I got it, I unwrapped it from the beautiful box, the pretty bag, and took the letter out of the special envelope.
Yes, this wallet told me my true worth. Every time I needed to pay for something, I would feel successful and confident. I would feel beautiful and luxurious (not money-rich, but life-rich). I would be able to tell myself, in the words of Marie Forleo…there's more where that came from.
January of 2018 started off with more in accounts receivable than I made in the first four months of 2017. Is the wallet magic? No. But it sure does make me feel magical.
What are you hanging on to that is bringing you down subconsciously and decreasing your self-worth? Are you hanging on to clothes that don't fit? Shoes that are too tight? Driving a car that needs to be washed? Tell me one thing you can change to make you feel magical.
This article was originally published in Money, Inc.